Turning 24.

Four days ago, I turned twenty four.

I did not do anything particularly special for my birthday. There was no cake with a candle, no fancy meals, no huge celebrations, no birthday cards. Life went on as usual, I did not feel particularly happy nor sad. Attended classes in the morning and carried out my duties as a residential assistant, along with a meeting that lasted till late. It was, in fact, a peculiarly busy and long day for the second week of the semester.

Perhaps, I have come to learn over the years what is truly valuable. The urgency to tell people of the gospel, and the need to grow in maturity in Christ. Even though I am 24, I still have plenty of space to grow in Christ. Going with the cliché of making birthday wishes, I do have a couple of wishes. To grow in godliness, and be bold in telling people about the gospel. There are things that I think and consider about, such as praying and looking for a partner (God willing, of course), writing short essays to encourage Christians, meeting someone to read the bible with, and what I want to do after I graduate.

Turning 24, it marks a stage of life where I am somewhat caught in between. I have two more semesters left, and a senior in university. It is the time to plan and to make full use of before things change as I head out into the working world. So close to getting out, yet quite unsure if the working world is for me. But turning 24, I hope I will be wiser in making decisions.

Here's to a good and busy year ahead.

Thirst to win.

I've been skipping more, running more, doing more dips, doing more push ups, doing more crunches, eating healthier, and eating less. All of it to tone up the muscles, increase my stamina and lose some weight. It's been a very long while since I had this deep desire to win. I think it is a mixture of several factors. Largely because that there is a good chance of clinching gold, and partly to prove that I am on top of my game, at least among the colleges. But it's been quite a challenge coming to terms with that and to be honest, it does not feel good.

Hope that I'll be able to put things into perspective as the semester begins, and that I will carefully consider what matters most to me, beyond my uni life and gold medals.

Christmas, Christmas - time of the year

It's rainy, wet, cold, festive, celebratory, joyful, fearful, and a period of reflecting on the year past.

Sitting down at my semi-messy table, the best thing that has happened this year, that makes it a special one, was perhaps my baptism on Good Friday. It was a thought that I toyed with for a few years, but never quite had the courage to take that step and make a public proclamation of my faith, in the presence of friends, both believing and non-believing (to hear about the God that I am proclaiming). The dunking aside, it marks a milestone in my faith as a Christian for seven years (!), and there will be many more along the way to come, God willing. There have been occasions that I did not behave as a Christian should, even though I am trying hard. Godliness is a goal that I am constantly striving towards, it will be a hard journey, but one that God has promised and it is the only right response if I were to proclaim Him as my God.

Uni life has been fantastic, and packed full of activities, meeting new people, trying out new things and failing at some. There have been some points in the past 2.5 years in NUS that have been disappointing, but I am thoroughly thankful for where I am today that God has placed me. Biz, USP, Regen-the three most important parts of my uni life. At biz, I learn what I like. At USP, I am exposed to things I never thought I'd ever learn. At regen, possibly the best support from fellow Christians I have outside of church. There are plenty of things that I wished I had put more time in, instead of just wasting my time on unproductive and unhelpful stuff. 1.5/2 years left in NUS, it's perhaps not too late to think of and act on making better use of my time.

23 years old, and turning 24 in exactly a month. A possible third of my life has passed. There is still plenty in life and about Christ to learn, and to live. And the thing about getting a partner and marriage, it is still something that I am earnestly praying for.

2014, you've been a good one. Here's to another great year ahead.

Jude.

The letter from Jude is perhaps one of the shortest of the 66 books in the bible. Yet, in those few verses, it packs a punch. The reminder to contend for the gospel and its truth is compelling, and still very much relevant in today's context in Singapore. 

So far, over two Sundays at church, I have learnt heaps and been very encouraged by the sermons, not that I haven't been before that. For the sake of the gospel, it is of utmost importance and urgency to rebuke false teachers and throw false teaching out of the window, for they are no gospel and not about God. 

The reasons the false teachers give, especially regarding false teaching, may seem plausible at first. Upon probing and deeper examination, all the maggots and rotten insides get exposed. One common argument put forth by such groups is "What we preach does not really matter, what is most important is that we are brining people to God. Can't you see our church growing and new people accepting Christ?" But the implication of making that statement is that God's kingdom and church will grow through false teachings! What heresy! God's church is based on the gospel of Jesus Christ, not on the prosperity gospel, not a chance. The bible can't be clearer on that. 

Dear brothers and sister in Christ, for the sake of the gospel and the truth, fight, reject and cast out false teachings at all costs. Be discerning and loving, even though the latter can be very hard to do. Remember, it is for the sake of Jesus Christ. 

Accepting (perceived) Differences

Differences can be frustrating. Sometimes, I question why do certain groups of people not do things a particular way. Some other times, I hope they could change so that there will be less friction. But all the time, I am missing the point, as far as my concerns are, well, concerned. 

The focus on myself is essentially selfish, and putting what matters most out of the picture. What the bible says is true and should guide the way I think, and I could so easily point of the times where the latter has not been the case. Fundamentally speaking, we all gather because of what Christ has done. That's why we see the necessity to keep pushing each other on in the right direction. If that remains the same, I don't think the initial bitterness would surface. 

Perhaps I am just too cynical about everything, which might not be such a good thing sometimes. It is, at times, wiser to let go of my own selfish beliefs and take that 'bible snob' out, putting it to death. It's not only about head knowledge, as we always say. 

Of joy, and thankfulness.

"It's 2 o'clock", my laptop tells me in a matter-of-fact tone. Yes, it is 2 in the morning. 

I have been staying up late and messing with my sleep cycle, and it has affected me a fair bit. I'm clearly feeling the fatigue, and I still have to trudge through each day's duties. Those are, after all, my duties. There are some things that I still enjoy doing and will find time to do no matter how tired I am feeling and how terrible the week has been. 

All I want sometimes is to just spend an hour or two in the kitchen (yes, any kitchen!) and prepare a good meal for myself or an additional portion too. Food gathers people and it is possibly the best way too. It is through the people that God has placed around me that I am also encouraged to serve them and learn from them. And through which, I derive joy, knowing that all these come from God alone. 

This semester of uni has been one that's challenging for me, and the most tiring one to date. I think, however, that it happens to be the most meaningful one. Even though it can be hard to see certain things not working out and not going according to plan, and that it has been trying to get through each week, God has been particularly gracious as he has always been. For that, and what Christ has done, I am thankful. I do not deserve this, not a single bit.

I just need a couple of moments away, maybe just a couple more.

Conversations.

Good conversations go a long way, and they do good. I am grateful and in awe of the way God works. What was supposed to be a simple coffee break in the afternoon and introducing two friends to what I have been drinking turned out to be an intense (in a helpful way!) conversation about Christianity and its fundamentals.

It wasn't my first time talking about this topic, but it is the first time talking about this topic to people not from church or regen. It is refreshing to hear and discuss our views on praise and worship, speaking in tongues, and the purpose of certain things we do, among a lot of other things. It is encouraging to see fellow Christians here in USP taking plenty of joy in Christ, and thinking about things.

We can all say that we are Christians, yet each one of us differ in our stand on certain issues. Ultimately, it is Christ and what He has done that joins us as one family. It is because of our faith in Christ that brings us together. Points of disagreements prevail, but these are peripheral. It is ever so easy to put on that ivory tower mindset in the way we approach other Christians, thinking cynically about everyone else. Not only is that not helpful, it is sinful. Essentially, by doing so, one is putting Christ out of the picture. We are Christians, and we need Jesus as much as another Christian needs, and as much as a non-Christian needs.

I will keep asking questions, not in doubt that Christ is not enough, but to marvel at His greatness. They call it 'equipping'.